9-11-01 ( WE WILL NEVER FORGET ) BEEN TWO MONTHS AND IT'S TIME

Well ... Several people have been asking why I haven't been doing my blog (Good ??) !!! I'm going to go out on a limb and say it's because I've been screwing up. Nobody wants to blog negative things about yourself, but doing this each Tuesday kept me focused. I'm going back and trying to start from what got me down 200 pounds. I've worked so hard and don't want to fall back into the bad habits that got me to 600.

I left work this morning and said to myself, what can I do to get back on track and get out of this funk. This is when I thought about my kids I coach for the "Canes", my new thing to these kids every time I see them is "Hard work & Dedication" ... it's time I do the same !!!! Then I thought about my best friend and realized I need to be here many more years for him. It's time I pull my head out of my ass and start working hard and get back to the "NO EXCUSES MONK" !!! Over the past two Months I've been back doing everything I love but falling back to not putting myself first and taking that time for "ME". It's time that I make sure exercise gets put first along with having a healthy life style once again. I have been eating anything and everything that I'm not supposed to be eating. The good ole tomorrow/ next Monday came out of my mouth a few times. I'm pissed because I took over a Month away from Mason and this is not fair to him that I go back to the old Monk. As of today 9-11 (A Day That Hits Home), I'm back and going to finish what I started.

I'm not being hard on myself or me looking for the pity train, we all struggle and I just want everyone to see that I'm human. Meaning I've had sooo many people ask how I do it, ETC  ... I just want them to understand that it's a fight for myself still as well. I weighed in this morning and gained about 15 pounds back, this is not going over well with me. It's all good though, I'm back and it's on like donkey Kong.

I let myself get back into what I thought would be the easy way, started taking phentermine like the first time I lost all my weight. Then I thought the work was over and the pill will do the rest for me, nothing is easy about getting the weight off and "HARD WORK & DEDICATION" is what it will take to the end. I stopped taking them and going back to what worked for me the past several Months !!! Well, just wanted to share my past two Months with all of you and look forward to my Tuesday blog with great results each week starting today !!!

HOPE EVERYONE HAD A HEALTHY JULY

Good Morning "Team Monk" !!!! It's been about three weeks since my last blog, need to get over that bump in the road I've been fighting for the past Month. As of my last blog, I haven't got on the scale, but that's not the only thing I haven't done. I have not been putting myself first once again which is why I found myself gaining all my weight back the first go around several years ago. On a positive note, my goal was to drop like 30 pounds in 25 days, it can be done ... but you have to work hard and stay focused which I didn't do neither. I'm okay with that because I didn't gain weight as of this morning. Now is my time again to realize how close I am to reaching so many goals that Ive been working so hard towards. One thing is for sure, I'm not going to worry about making big goals anymore. The way I see it is if I can worry about each small goal then they will all turn into that big goal down the road. Need to worry about walking first before running and that's what I'm not doing by trying to set goals like I have been. My new goal is simple, just have a good week in the gym and eating right. Then repeat this for the next week over and over and before long it will turn into a  Month.

I really don't have much to say right now, talk is cheap !!! My point is I can blog all day about what I need to do, but talking about it and doing it are two different things. I need to just shut up and sweat !!!!! I do want to take the time and let everyone know that I'm still here and still fighting this fight against obesity. Today I'm spending the day with my son, yesterday hits home for me and many others as a father decided to take his life along with his own family where I live in Owings Maryland. Life is to short everyone, enjoy every minute you have with your loved ones and let's all make sure we concentrate on our health so we can spend many more years with them. Until next Tuesday, everyone go spend time with your loved ones and take this journey one step/day at a time !!! I promise you it won't be easy but definitely will be worth it. Until next Tuesday, i'm going to shut up and just do it !!!!

IT'S BEEN A FEW WEEKS SO THAT MEANS I'M IN A FUNK AGAIN

Where do I start, let's see !!!!! You can always tell when I'm in a funk because I don't blog on Tuesdays. It's away to hide and not have to admit your not doing what I'm suppose to be doing and feel like your letting others down. The truth is, only person your letting down is yourself because everyone who really cares about you will support and love you no matter what. I refuse to sit here and start with the 100 excuses of why the past two weeks have been a disaster for me. My last blog I lost a few pounds to reach my lowest point but have gained that right back with a few extra. On a good note I no why and no what needs to be done, Beast Mode needs to kick in gear and just do it !!!! Over the past two weeks I've been super busy and have allowed myself to do things I enjoy doing for the first time since coming home. Problem here,  it's not doing these things but having to learn how to do them and not fall off track with working out and eating right. My last blog I talked about make sure you don't set yourself up for failure and that's exactly what I'm doing. I have caught myself going back to a really bad habit, that's me putting everyone else first before myself. It sounds mean but when I came home it was all about me first and taking the time to get healthy and eat right. Now I'm involved in several projects and starting to put everything first before myself. I have to learn that it's okay to take all this on but have to put me first and find the time to get my work outs in and stay eating healthy. On a good note, it's only been a few weeks and haven't done much damage to all my hard work. Just had a little set back but I'm still on course to reach all my goals Ive set for myself this year, now it's time to shut up and sweat.

This weekend was when I was supposed to go and try out for the Biggest Loser (Show) but don't think I'm going to make this trip. I would love the chance to get help and continue to reach my goals but it's a big game. My life is not about playing a game, maybe this is away to make myself feel better about not going. Don't get me wrong, who wouldn't dream of having this opportunity but I'm so confident I can do this on my own and not have to walk away from my best friend. Trust me, I think about if I did get picked going away for 6 Months will give me several more years with my son. If I do what Ive learn and keep doing what Ive been doing i'm still going to reach these goals with out having to leave him for up to 6 Months :( !!! Not to mention it would be a lot to put my career on hold and not even sure how I would do that. My time is now, it's no reason after loosing over 200 pounds that I can't continue this journey on my own at home. I have plenty of support here and have surrounded myself with great people going through the same battle. Things in life happen for a reason, and me winning that trip to California was the first step of me saving my own life.

Ive decided as of today "Tuesday" to skip the scale until August 1st, which is a day after my normal weigh in day but three weeks away. this will give me a chance to not concentrate on numbers but just do what I'm supposed to do and the numbers are going to be show on that Wednesday if I put the work in. My goal is really huge, not sure if it can be done .... but I always aim for bigger things in life so why stop now. My goal will stay to me but I will let everyone no what it was and if I made it or not on my blog in three weeks. However, I will blog each Tuesday !!!! Once again, thanks for following my journey and the amount of support you all give me.

AFTER A REQUEST I'M GOING TO SHARE MY DAILY ROUTINE AND WHAT FOODS I EAT !!!!!

Morning Team "Monk" !!!! After last Tuesday, I had left for Ocean City for a few days and had a few meals that were not good for me. Like I said before, this is Vacation and this type of stuff  we will be faced with in life. It's just making better decisions and staying on track and not doing what most of us do on a daily basis, quit on our self !!!!! With that being said I pretty much had three meals between two days of anything I wanted. Of course pizza was involved in one as this is my favorite and I loved it, LOL !!! In the past with one bad meal, I would of thought (I just ate bad so I'm just going to eat bad all day and start back tomorrow). Then the next day would come and I would repeat this until I wait for that Monday that never gets here. If this is you "STOP", it will catch up with you like it did me and one day you will be looking in the mirror with tears running down your face asking how did I ever get to 600 pounds, it happen to me !!!!! So, once I got home on Thursday it was game on and I kicked ass this week and lost that 6.8 pounds I gained over the two weeks. Once again this is Winning in my book, now I'm going to break this weight bracket next Tuesday and reach another personnel mile stone for "ME".

Just left the doctors and I'm healthy as can be and all my blood work is EXCELLENT !!!! Ive beat it all, now I'm going to continue to beat obesity which will be a life long fight. It's okay though, I'm stubborn and don't like to loose so I will keep fighting until the end. I will be here to watch my son grow as a man, these are things that keep that fire burning inside of me. I can't lie though, I do have the pressure of everyone following my journey, however I love it and this keeps me pushing each day as well (Thanks). I just love the fact that I'm helping inspire others to get Healthy while taking the time to save my own life.

After a few request, what is a day in Monk's world ??? Well first off ... a day in my world is a blast because I have the best son in the world :) !!! On a normal day, I get up in the morning and try to eat breakfast ASAP because as they say this is the most important meal of the day. I have been taking egg white and making an omelet with fresh vegetables or sometimes some turkey with fresh salsa. Then I have my 100 calorie sandwich thins and this puts me at 300 calories for breakfast. If I'm on the run, it's all about Subway and I still stay at around 300 calories. For lunch, I try and have my left overs from the night before or Subway. I'm always on the run, I try and stay active and busy which is burning them calories. If I'm not having them, I may do fat free hot dogs or these sausage's from whole foods that are around 100 calories (Turkey). I do eat salad or a fresh turkey sandwich a lot as well !!!! Most of the time Ive worked out between breakfast and lunch or just after lunch. Since hurting my knee Ive cut back on my working out, but I still stay active and keep moving which all adds up. Like you've heard a 100 times, take the steps at work, park a little away from the store, clean the house/car because this all is burning calories. After all of that I still work out, but I have cut the 6 miles back to around 2 or 3 when I go. My knee is getting better and I'm still working out which is what my goal was. Don't forget, it's summer and going to the pool can be a good work out as well along with relaxing and a fun thing you can do with the whole family. Now dinner, I will list after my blog a few ideas of what I eat but it' all about what you like and will keep you on track. My advise would be take it day by day and concentrate on that day only and before you know it that will turn into weeks. One thing is for sure, I'm very active and try and keep myself busy because I know if I'm moving the calories are being burned. Like I tell everyone, it's hard but can be done if you put the dedication and hard work into it. Why wouldn't you, your worth it !!! If your having problems getting started, think about what you love the most in life and can't live a day with out. Then tell yourself, if I don't change my life that thing or person won't be in my life because I'm killing myself (This is when you cry) but it's what you need. You have to find what motivates YOU, think about all the stuff your weight stops you from doing in life. Like I realized, you only get one life so enjoy it and live it the way you want. I'm only saying all of this because this was all me, I'm tired of having my weight hold me back from living life and being happy. Nobody is telling you to run out and change everything your doing, it's a lifestyle change and it takes time. Just figure out what got you here, Tonya at BL asked us this at the resort, it makes you do a lot of soul searching. People always say but I can't do this, or I can't do that, or I don't have time. Trust me when I say this, that's all an EXCUSE !!!! I was that guy, I could of published my own book on Excuses because I had one for everything. Guess what, this guy was 600 pounds and did it so that is living proof that it can be done and there is not many reasons why you can't as well. Trust me, I still don't have all the answers and struggle as well but I'm in a mentally better place about everything. Like always, don't hesitate to ask if you need help, because I know it's hard and can be very depressing.

I'm looking into my first 5K as well, kinda nervous but I'm thinking about one in September and then the one in October, check it out at www.runforyourlives.com !!!!

Dinner - Stuffed Peppers (Turkey), Turkey Burgers, Chicken (I eat a lot), Fish, Spaghetti with turkey, Turkey taco's, Chicken wraps (Favorite), Sandwich, Sweet Potato, Brown Rice, Fresh Vegetables (Never will eat can again), Soup, Salad, Turkey Manwich, Turkey Chili, Subway (They are everywhere), Grilled Chicken Sandwich !!!! This is to name a few, let me go through my book this week and will blog again before next Tuesday with Recipes out of my cook books from the BL !!!!!

Hope everyone has a good week, let today be the day you make that change !!!!!!

BIRTHDAY+FATHERS DAY+OCEAN CITY CONVENTION = NOT THE BEST WEEK ON THE SCALE

Sorry for the delay, but it's Thursday and I'm just getting home from Ocean City from a mini little Vacation. On Tuesday, I got on the scale and new it wasn't going to be a great week after my Birthday along with Fathers Day. I gained a few pounds which wasn't the end of the world, this is called life as Holidays, Birthdays, Vacation, Etc will happen through out the year. I'm still happy with the choices I made during the past few weeks, I could of just said screw it and eaten bad all day long but it wasn't like that. I made better decisions and enjoyed one meal a day on anything I wanted and still had some cake for my Birthday. Now that I'm home it's game time as Tuesday is only 5 days away and it's time to face the scale again. I'm going to work hard the next 5 days and have a good weigh in on Tuesday. Once again, it's the decisions we make if we are successful or fail and it's all on us if we set our self up for failure. Me, this weekend I went and got to meet the Yankees and was outside all day and didn't bring my water or had food available. Of course after missing lunch I was ready to eat anything and did just that. This is a perfect example how I set myself up to fail, but you learn from your mistakes and next time I will pack something and have plenty of water available. Back in the day i would of eaten bad all day after having just one bad meal, sometimes would even go as far as saying I will get back on track Monday. What you don't think about is how far your setting yourself back waiting for that Monday to get here. That's why I say it's not a diet but a lifestyle change, you have something bad doesn't mean you quit on yourself.

So with the few pounds Ive gained, had a great Birthday, Fathers day, Ocean City and had the Chance to meet Derek Jeter and the rest of the Yankees. Once again I'm working out hard like today with a two mile walk on this 97 degree day. Really need to get a few things done before another 48hrs at work in the morning. I'm going to keep tonight short and sweet and keep on going strong with my journey to 300 pounds lost. Until Tuesday, everyone keep pushing hard, take one step/day at a time and remember ... your worth it, now go get it !!!!!

Shame on me, I didn't mention that my best friend invited me to have breakfast with him at School for Fathers day and had a banana there for me. Then had the pleassure to watch him play his last T-Ball game the following day not to mention he hit two home runs. This guy here is one proud daddy and love the little man Mason is already becoming. Now Daddy/Coach Monk can't wait for football to start in July/August !!!

LITTLE THINGS MAKE THE WORLD OF DIFFERENCE AND KEEPS ME PUSHING FOR EVEN BETTER RESULTS

Another Tuesday is here team "Monk" !!!!!! Hope all of you have started your journey of living a new healthy lifestyle. If not, tomorrow is a new day and let's start out slow and take one day at a time. This week showed me that hard work pays off in various ways. Let's see, I decided to take my son to a baseball game, before I would of went to the game and had a few beers and this would of been my excuse to eat all the junk I wanted. This time I showed my son that we could pack a healthy lunch and still enjoy a day at the park. While at the park we parked in a spot a little far from where we had to go so I could take this as a chance to get my daily walk in. Once inside the park, I was a little nervous because I decided to purchase normal seats. Your asking yourself normal, before if I wanted to attend a game we would have to request special seating so I would have room. Most of the time people would  ask me to go with them too a game because they new sports was my life or even offer me free tickets but I always made up an excuse. Not this time, we bought our tickets and for the first time in 8 years I felt comfortable in a seat and could actually enjoy the game with my son. These small rewards make this journey worth all the pain along with showing me what it's like to enjoy life again.

Now my week, once again I took this week head on and had a great week all the way around. This morning it all paid off with another 6 pounds down when Monk vs Scale took place. I'm very proud of how I took charge of my life again after finding myself in a major funk a few weeks ago. Another good example of it's not how you fall but how you get back up. I'm 2 pounds away from hitting another weight bracket and 32 away from my new goal that was set.

Over the next two weeks I'm going to be faced with many challenges for various reasons. First one is the fact my Birthday is this Friday, then we have Fathers Day to follow on Sunday. Then on Saturday is the start of Fireman's Convention that takes place in Ocean City in June. This is always a big Month for me that always lead to very bad decisions in the past  due to the amount of things taken place this Month. Over the next two weeks I must learn how to enjoy all of the above and still make better decisions and loose/maintain my weight. Check back next Tuesday as we will be in the middle of Ocean City week to see just how good Ive done.

On another note, Ive lost over 200 pounds but still have a lot of work to be done. I have thought long and hard over the past few days about everything and have decided to try out for the Biggest Loser "Show" once again. If your reading this and asking I thought he just went there, that was the resort not the actual TV show. I have started working on things that must be done and will be attending a live casting call in July. A few years ago we attended one in Pittsburgh and this time will be going to NC for a few days. No matter what happens I'm going to continue my journey at home and beat this and still do anything I can to help others do the same.

Hope everyone has enjoyed another Tuesday following my journey, Ive created a facebook page as well called "Firefighter Saving His Life" if you would like to follow there. I have posted numerous pictures along with trying to motivate people or have a place for everyone to go for support.

TODAY MARKS THE DAY WHERE I HAVE LOST OVER 200 POUNDS

Good evening Team "Monk" !!!! Last week I decided not to weigh in and concentrate on myself and not so much on the numbers. Well this Tuesday means it's been two weeks since Monk vs Scale took place and I was a little nervous. Over the past two weeks Ive been kicking ass but still not 100% with my knee so I have not been putting as much into my work outs. However over the past two weeks Ive had a few days I really picked it up another notch and worked my butt off. When I got on the scale two weeks ago I had gained 12.4 pounds which I thought was crazy, but this morning I lost that 12.4 pounds with another 12 on top of that being down 24 pounds in two weeks. Maybe that 12.4 was water weight or fake weight as we call it because of salt or who knows why, all I know is I'm down 24 pounds and just passed over the 200 pound mark. I was so freaking pumped that I got off the scale and immediately went for a Hike to celebrate this achievement. Most people take the day off or feel like they can cheat a little when they loose weight. I'm the opposite, when I see the work paying off I just want to work that much harder to continue reaching my goals.

Tomorrow is a new day and next Tuesday is a new Monk vs Scale so it's back to work in the morning because I want to continue this lifestyle change with another great week. Lot of people struggle with weight lost and Ive been one of them people my entire life. If your just starting to follow my journey, then I will share with you that this is my second time around. About ten years ago I was hitting the 600 pound mark and got down to 240 pounds with a lot of hard work. I was young and dumb and thought that since I lost it once, it would be easy to do it again as I noticed myself putting weight back on. It was July and I was going in for knee surgery when I learned that I was well above 550 pounds for the second time in my life. Only thing is this time it was not easy at all, in fact I had days when I thought it would be impossible with being well over 30 and having a very hard time. That's when I did a lot of soul searching and educated myself with nutrition and my body. Since then Ive learned so much about myself and what it takes to start a journey of getting healthy. Between learning these things and spending over a Month at the Resort Ive learned/educated myself so much to set me up for success this go around. This is not a diet for me, they don't work .... this is what you call a lifestyle change. I still struggle and have my good and bad days just like everyone else, I'm sure I'm going to experience plenty of more bad days in my future. One good thing is Ive surrounded myself with a wonderful support group that have been so supportive. Ive already been held back from doing so many things in life that everyone should have the chance to do, you only live once. With that being said them days are over of not going to the movies, theme parks, sporting events or just having dinner in a booth. One thing that drove me nuts is walking in and having everyone stare at you then whisper about you and laugh. Nothing funny about what we have to go through on a daily basis, everyone has problems and this is mine.

Kinda jumped off subject but thought I would blow off some steam because people in this world can be so evil. This is why you push the negative people out of your life and surround yourself with good people to keep a positive atmosphere around you. One thing I continue to do is pay it forward anyway I can since winning the trip to the Biggest Loser Resort in Malibu. So many deserving people didn't get picked but I was one of the lucky 10 to get a chance of a life time. Not only for me and my family but this journey is for everyone fighting the battle of obesity. I want to lead by example and show everyone that it can be done with hard work and dedication. Not only am I trying to be a great role model for my son, but I want to be one for everyone who is going though the same struggles as me.

In the next week, myself and my buddy Mike will be starting a 90 day Challenge sponsored by Bodybyvi Biggest Loser style. More information/details will be released soon.

Last week I told everyone that more pictures would be posted, never before would I have the courage to post these but I'm in a better place today. I want everyone to see what can be done once you put your mind to it. I'm not proud of how I got, but I'm dam proud of the man Ive become over the years and will continue to be an excellent role model for my son, family, and all of you. Until next Tuesday, make today the start of getting healthy and living that life you want and deserve.

"Instead of giving yourself reasons why you can't, give yourself reasons why you can."
"You don't drown by falling in the water, you drown by staying there."

 
 MASON .... YOU WILL NEVER REALIZE HOW MUCH YOU SAVED YOUR DADDY'S LIFE .... YOUR ONLY 5 BUT THANK YOU FOR TEACHING DADDY WHAT LIFE IS ALL ABOUT, I'M SO PROUD OF YOU AND LOVE THAT YOUR NOT ONLY MY SON BUT MY BEST FRIEND !!!!!