IT'S BEEN A FEW WEEKS SO THAT MEANS I'M IN A FUNK AGAIN

Where do I start, let's see !!!!! You can always tell when I'm in a funk because I don't blog on Tuesdays. It's away to hide and not have to admit your not doing what I'm suppose to be doing and feel like your letting others down. The truth is, only person your letting down is yourself because everyone who really cares about you will support and love you no matter what. I refuse to sit here and start with the 100 excuses of why the past two weeks have been a disaster for me. My last blog I lost a few pounds to reach my lowest point but have gained that right back with a few extra. On a good note I no why and no what needs to be done, Beast Mode needs to kick in gear and just do it !!!! Over the past two weeks I've been super busy and have allowed myself to do things I enjoy doing for the first time since coming home. Problem here,  it's not doing these things but having to learn how to do them and not fall off track with working out and eating right. My last blog I talked about make sure you don't set yourself up for failure and that's exactly what I'm doing. I have caught myself going back to a really bad habit, that's me putting everyone else first before myself. It sounds mean but when I came home it was all about me first and taking the time to get healthy and eat right. Now I'm involved in several projects and starting to put everything first before myself. I have to learn that it's okay to take all this on but have to put me first and find the time to get my work outs in and stay eating healthy. On a good note, it's only been a few weeks and haven't done much damage to all my hard work. Just had a little set back but I'm still on course to reach all my goals Ive set for myself this year, now it's time to shut up and sweat.

This weekend was when I was supposed to go and try out for the Biggest Loser (Show) but don't think I'm going to make this trip. I would love the chance to get help and continue to reach my goals but it's a big game. My life is not about playing a game, maybe this is away to make myself feel better about not going. Don't get me wrong, who wouldn't dream of having this opportunity but I'm so confident I can do this on my own and not have to walk away from my best friend. Trust me, I think about if I did get picked going away for 6 Months will give me several more years with my son. If I do what Ive learn and keep doing what Ive been doing i'm still going to reach these goals with out having to leave him for up to 6 Months :( !!! Not to mention it would be a lot to put my career on hold and not even sure how I would do that. My time is now, it's no reason after loosing over 200 pounds that I can't continue this journey on my own at home. I have plenty of support here and have surrounded myself with great people going through the same battle. Things in life happen for a reason, and me winning that trip to California was the first step of me saving my own life.

Ive decided as of today "Tuesday" to skip the scale until August 1st, which is a day after my normal weigh in day but three weeks away. this will give me a chance to not concentrate on numbers but just do what I'm supposed to do and the numbers are going to be show on that Wednesday if I put the work in. My goal is really huge, not sure if it can be done .... but I always aim for bigger things in life so why stop now. My goal will stay to me but I will let everyone no what it was and if I made it or not on my blog in three weeks. However, I will blog each Tuesday !!!! Once again, thanks for following my journey and the amount of support you all give me.